Hey there! I know it already seems like forever ago, but how was your Thanksgiving? If you chose to do something differently this year, whether it was a big change (starting your own tradition) or a more internal one (being armed with your self-care arsenal before walking into your in-laws), you weren't alone. So, how did it go? I'm guessing both good and little scary. However it went, you did it, and I am very happy for you! You took the step. You flexed your healthy boundary muscles. You are learning how you want to show up in the world; how to be human; how to be YOU even when people don't get it.
You know, there is a good chunk of our earlier lives spent learning how to adapt to certain people and situations so that we fit in, make life easier for others, or don't have love/attention/affection withheld from us as little people. Unfortunately, after a long time that adapting becomes a habit and we can forget who we are at our center.
Now is the time to stop adapting! Now is the time to find your center! Life is short and you are worth it! You are an amazing human and doing the world an incredible disservice by continuing to hide under other people's expectations and rules. I am not saying you should never be accommodating, flexible or negotiable. Pick your battles. We all have to make sacrifices in relationships and life. But, figure out your non-negotiables in people and situations. If you find that you are spending the majority of your time (during the holidays or otherwise) adapting or having your boundaries crossed, it may be time to make changes - both to your behavior and to you inner circle of peeps.
So, carry on, my Inner Peace Warrior! You've got another month of holiday fun ahead. Make it your own. Do things differently if you need to and for Pete's sake, do lots of things that bring you joy!
Jacque Saltsman is a Healer and Life Coach who is committed to the empowerment and healing of women locally and globally. Jacque has attended and staffed the Woman Within Training Weekend and sits in an amazing E-circle in her hometown of Louisville, Kentucky. She can be found at jacquesaltsman.com.