You know, there is a good chunk of our earlier lives spent learning how to adapt to certain people and situations so that we fit in, make life easier for others, or don't have love/attention/affection withheld from us as little people. Unfortunately, after a long time that adapting becomes a habit and we can forget who we are at our center.
Now is the time to stop adapting! Now is the time to find your center! Life is short and you are worth it! You are an amazing human and doing the world an incredible disservice by continuing to hide under other people's expectations and rules. I am not saying you should never be accommodating, flexible or negotiable. Pick your battles. We all have to make sacrifices in relationships and life. But, figure out your non-negotiables in people and situations. If you find that you are spending the majority of your time (during the holidays or otherwise) adapting or having your boundaries crossed, it may be time to make changes - both to your behavior and to you inner circle of peeps.
So, carry on, my Inner Peace Warrior! You've got another month of holiday fun ahead. Make it your own. Do things differently if you need to and for Pete's sake, do lots of things that bring you joy!